How to deal with strict parents at parent teacher conferences

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Ask an administrator to be present. You shouldn’t do this for every parent conference, but if you are genuinely nervous that things may get heated, ask for an administrator to sit in on it with you. Make sure you let parents know this ahead of time if you can so that it doesn’t look like you’re trying to be sneaky or catch them off-guard.

7 Tips for Teachers on Dealing with Difficult Parents
  1. No Surprises. …
  2. Meet Face-to-Face with Parents. …
  3. Alert Your Principal or Department Chair to the Situation. …
  4. Listen and Ask Questions. …
  5. Try to Find Things You Agree On. …
  6. Don’t Allow Yourself to Be Pressured. …
  7. Know When the Conversation Is Over.

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Is the parent-teacher conference stressful?

The parent-teacher conference can be a stressful time for both parents and teachers – even more so if your child possibly has a problem. This article offers strategies for getting the most out of the conference, and also includes stories from veteran teachers of successful (and not-so-successful) parent-teacher conferences.

How do I ask for a special Parent-Teacher Conference?

You can ask for a special parent-teacher conference if you have concerns about your child’s progress. You might want to request a teacher conference if you aren’t getting enough information about your child’s education through notes, emails and returned class work from the teacher.

Do Parent-Teacher meetings work?

There are the parents who push back on any critique, the ones who don’t understand how to help, and the ones who never show. The meetings aren’t that much easier for parents, who rush to squeeze them in on a workday or feel the teacher isn’t understanding their child. But parent-teacher meetings can be productive.

What happens if you are late for a parent teacher conference?

Parent-teacher conferences are usually stacked in an evening after school. Before you there will be a conference with another set of parents. After you, another parent wants her one-to-one time with the teacher. If you’re late, you will be interrupting all the other parents.

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What should you do if a parent sounds intimidating at a parent conference?

How to Survive Even the Scariest Parent ConferencesCome prepared. … Make an effort to be dressed professionally and show that you have taken care with your appearance. … Ask an administrator to be present. … Rehearse for the worst, but hope for the best. … Think about your boundaries before the meeting starts.More items…•


What do you say to parents during parent teacher conference?

When planning what to say at parent teacher conferences, prepare a way to end on a positive note. You could tell why you love having the child in your class, highlight an overall strength, or a special connection you have with the child.


Why do some parents fear parent teacher conferences?

Some parents fear that they will be judged and.or criticized by the teacher – subtly or overtly – for not doing enough to assist their child academically or behaviorally. And if there is a difference of opinion patents fear that the teacher may take it out on their child in some way.


What should you not say at a parent teacher conference?

10 Things Not to Say at a Parent Teacher Conference“We don’t read at home.”“I have to help him with everything.” … “He doesn’t like school.” … “He doesn’t do well with a _____ teacher.” … “All you have to do is just call me.” … “He never acts this way at home.” … “I always believe my child.” … “There’s nothing else I can do.” … More items…•


What should teachers do to effectively deal with unplanned parent conferences?

What should teachers do to effectively deal with unplanned parent conferences? Listen to the parents until they are finished talking. What does it mean to listen effectively? Listening for the real content and feelings in a person’s message and restating the message to assure you understand.


What do teachers talk about at parent-teacher conferences?

Good parent–teacher conferences focus on how well the child is doing in school. They also talk about how the child can do even better. To get ready for the conversation, look at your child’s homework, tests, and notices before the conference. Be sure to bring a list of questions that you would like to ask the teacher.


What are two strategies you could try for getting such hard to reach parents to have a conference with you about their child’s progress?

Try to remain calm and follow a few tips from the National Education Association:Emphasize the positive.Let the parents talk first.Use active listening. … Discuss how both parties want what’s best for the child.Agree on a strategy and get on the same page before including the child in the conversation.


What parents want to hear from teachers?

Dear Teachers: Here are 10 Things Every Parent Wants You to KnowDear Teachers, Here are 10 Things Every Parent Wants You to Know…I respect, appreciate, and support you.I am sending you my baby, my whole world.My child is gifted.I care just as much about how my child treats others as I do about what he is learning.More items…•


What questions should I ask at parent teacher conference?

Questions About the CurriculumCan you describe your teaching style?What skills are you working to develop right now?How do these skills relate to the goals of the entire school year?What are the five most important skills you want students to develop this year?Does my student have to take standardized tests?More items…•


How do you prepare for a difficult parent-teacher conference?

Avoid angry or apologetic reactions. Instead, ask for examples. Ask what is being done about the problem and what strategies seem to help at school. Develop an action plan that may include steps that parents can take at home and steps the teacher will take at school.


What are the do’s and don’ts in planning and implementing parents teacher conference?

The Do’s and Don’ts of Parent-Teacher ConferencesDo start with a positive about their child. … Don’t forget that it’s a team effort. … Do share an example of a student’s reflection during the conference. … Don’t arrive unprepared. … Do give examples of what language you use at school and your expectations.More items…•


What should I wear to a parent-teacher conference?

How to Dress for Parent-Teacher ConferencesChoose Comfortable, But Pulled-Together Pieces. … Dark denim and a Classic Blouse. … Ankle-Length Pants and Print Blouses. … Fit-and-Flare Dresses With Cardigans. … Stylish Tunic Tops and Leggings. … V-Neck Sweaters and Pencil Skirts. … More Outfit Tips for Parent-Teacher Conferences.More items…


What do you say in parents meeting?

During the conferenceBe on time. … Be yourself. … Stay calm. … Ask for explanations of anything you don’t understand. … Ask the most important questions early in the conference. … Respectfully discuss differences of opinion. … Create an action plan. … Thank the teacher for meeting with you.


How do you give a parent meeting speech?

0:004:39Parent Teacher Meetings – English Meeting Conversation – YouTubeYouTubeStart of suggested clipEnd of suggested clipIn this lesson. We will see some sample conversations related to a parents and teachers. Meeting. MrMoreIn this lesson. We will see some sample conversations related to a parents and teachers. Meeting. Mr. George how’s my son Samuel doing in his studies. Samuel is a brilliant student mr.


How do you lead a parent teacher conference?

Here are eight tips to help you conduct masterful, action-oriented parent-teacher meetings.Be Proactive. … Be Welcoming. … Explain Objectives and Expectations. … Be Prepared. … Create an Action Plan. … Use the Good-Bad-Good Sandwich. … Don’t Tolerate Abuse. … Keep Lines of Communication Open.


How do I start PTM?

Starting the conversation: First of all greet the parents warmly. Welcome them into your space. Teachers should always start the conversation by highlighting the positives of the student. Every parent loves to hear what their child is good at.


Why do you need a parent-teacher conference?

You can ask for a special parent-teacher conference if you have concerns about your child’s progress. You might want to request a teacher conference if you aren’t getting enough information about your child’s education through notes, emails and returned class work from the teacher.


What should a parent-teacher conference include?

The teacher should have examples of your child’s schoolwork, any relevant test scores, and observations of the child’s class participation, academic work, and social growth to share with you. As a parent, it’s helpful to prepare some questions for the teacher conference about anything …


How long does a child’s teacher have to meet with parents?

Your child’s teacher has to meet with every parent in one day. Some schools split the time up and offer afternoon conferences and evening ones. Time spent per child’s guardians is usually limited to 10 to 15 minutes so be respectful of other people’s time and keep the conversation to the point.


Come prepared

The most important thing you can do to try to have a productive, positive conference is preparation ahead of time. Have any email correspondence printed, have student work ready and organized, any other documentation that might help you—tutorials offered, tutorials attended, reminders given, work from other students in the same class.


Make an effort to be dressed professionally and show that you have taken care with your appearance

You don’t need to buy or wear anything expensive or fancy necessarily (and if you are able to buy expensive things on your teacher’s paycheck, please let me know where you work so I can apply there immediately), but make sure this isn’t the day you’re wearing your most casual outfit either.


Ask an administrator to be present

You shouldn’t do this for every parent conference, but if you are genuinely nervous that things may get heated, ask for an administrator to sit in on it with you. Make sure you let parents know this ahead of time if you can so that it doesn’t look like you’re trying to be sneaky or catch them off-guard.


Rehearse for the worst, but hope for the best

When you’re at home or in your car, have a pretend conversation with the parent or parents in which they say the most absurd things imaginable, like, “Well, Steven says that you admitted to being the leader of a cult in your spare time,” or “We believe Katie is actually Albert Einstein reincarnated, so we know that it is not possible she’s ever been wrong in your class.” Practice your responses to these questions, (“Oh, Steven has such an imagination! Unfortunately, I think there’s a bit of a breakdown between what happens at school and what is being communicated at home.” And “Yes, Katie is so bright, and I love that about her! But even Albert Einstein had a tough time in school, and I want to make sure Katie makes it through this tough time using the incredible work ethic she and Albert share.”) Rehearsing for the worst won’t just prepare you for keeping a handle on your emotions, but chances are it won’t go nearly as badly as the worst you can imagine, so you’ll find yourself pleasantly surprised..


Think about your boundaries before the meeting starts

Often we come in knowing what we won’t do (ask Nathan 2,491 times per day to write his homework down, give Monica an A on a project when she clearly deserves a C on the rubric, etc.). But equally important is knowing ahead of time what you are willing to do.


Remember that what is said at home is not always the same as what happens at school

Many times when you encounter scary parents, this is what has happened: kid comes home crying because he/she is upset about something that may or not have been within their control. Mom/Dad’s protective instinct kicks in (rightfully). Kid omits/misrepresents details in order to avoid trouble/blame. Mom and Dad go to teacher.


Keep your cool

It will be a lot harder for Those Parents to be mean to you if you’re treating them with kindness and respect.


Why is parent-teacher conference important?

Take the parent-teacher conference as an opportunity to extend the lines of communication between home and school and develop a strategic plan for your students’ futures. Here are a few tips on how to handle the parent-teacher conference …


Can parents hear negative things about their children?

No parent wants to hear anything negative about their child. It’s always best to start with something positive, then follow it with what the child needs to work on, not what they are bad at.


Parent-Teacher Conferences During a Crisis

In a pandemic, parent-teacher conferences may need to occur on video calls and over email or other messaging platforms. And, in some cases, the shift to these platforms can actually increase the amount of communication between parents and educators.


Additional Resources

The Center for Family Engagement:
External link
hub from the National PTA offering useful videos, podcasts and research information.


Can parents be abusive?

It’s fine for parents to be angry, but it isn’t OK for them to be abusive. If that happens and it’s clear you’re not going to agree, it’s time to bring the conversation to a close. They may decide to take their complaint to the principal, and that’s fine. That’s how the system works.


Can a teacher change a grade?

A few parents may ask a teacher to change a grade or move their child forward even if he or she hasn’t fulfilled the requirements. You, of course, have to adhere to your professional ethics—and you don’t want the reputation of someone who can be manipulated by parents. If they want to, parents always have the option to escalate the problem to the principal.


Do parents feel kindly toward their child’s teacher?

But some parents may not feel so kindly toward their child’s teacher as the year winds down. Perhaps their child failed a final exam and needs to go to summer school, or maybe their child struggled throughout the year and you recommended testing to determine if they have a learning disability.


Who suggested that parents think their kids are perfect?

To handle tricky situations when you have to give negative feedback at conferences, an approach suggested by Joe Hirsch, a leadership coach and former curriculum developer, might help.


Who is Maria Paredes?

While working as the director of community education in Creighton Elementary School District in Phoenix, Maria Paredes developed Academic Parent-Teacher Teams (APTT), a new take on parent-teacher conferences that is now used by schools all over the country.


How long does it take for a teacher to give a presentation?

Students share their work with their parents for the first half hour, and then teachers give a 30-minute presentation just for parents that builds on the work students are doing in school. Afterward, teachers provide related resources—games, websites, readings—that families can take home to use with their children.


What is 11th grade meeting?

In 11th grade, the student-led meetings are college and career focused. Students discuss their career interests and hopes for college, then create an action plan so they’re ready to apply. “School is not here to happen to students,” says Dan St. Louis, University Park’s principal. “They are an active participant.”.


Who is Terri Eichholz?

Terri Eichholz, an elementary teacher of over 25 years, also suggests being proactive and getting ahead of the feedback. “Don’t wait for problems to arise. Make it a point to communicate frequently and positively so that you have already developed a relationship before you hit bumps in the road,” she says.


Do parent teacher conferences have to be a headache?

Parent-teacher conferences don’t have to be such a headache. Educators weigh in on how to solve common problems.


What is the biggest mistake in parenting?

Remember that your child is far more than the sum of your parenting skills. “The biggest mistake is overreacting before listening to all the information,” says Dr. Andrea Canter, a nationally certified school psychologist who worked 30 years for the Minneapolis school district.


Why aren’t children being identified quickly?

Children aren’t being identified quickly because there is an assumption that the problem is the language barrier.”. Separating the impact of language differences from that of a learning disability can be tricky, even for professionals. “A lot of parents are in denial, which makes it even more difficult,” says Driessen.


Who is Judy’s teacher?

Judy’s colleague, third grade teacher Laura Fender, comes to difficult conferences armed with examples. “I bring copies of other children’s work – with the names blacked out, of course,” she says. “I want the parents to see how their child’s work compares with others in the class.


Is a parent teacher conference stressful?

The parent-teacher conference can be a stressful time for both parents and teachers – even more so if your child possibly has a problem. This article offers strategies for getting the most out of the conference, and also includes stories from veteran teachers of successful (and not-so-successful) parent-teacher conferences.

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